Liam Denning, Columnist

Trump Would Like You To Buy Some Virtual Oil

His reported Strategic Petroleum Reserve scheme is a plan to funnel money to frackers, with a veneer of energy security.

President Donald Trump wants to buy some options that will probably never be called.

Photographer: Bloomberg/Bloomberg
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What is a Strategic Petroleum Reserve? It’s maybe the sort of thing you thought you knew. Perhaps you picture vast, dank pools of oil stashed in caverns located in specially selected locations — strategic, as it were — in the U.S. And for 635 million barrels of the stuff, you’ve pretty much nailed it.

But you really need to embrace the abstract; go bigger and more lateral, like you’re micro-dosing your way through a McKinsey interview. Because on some level, an SPR is really just, like, a number.