Matt Levine, Columnist

Hand Sanitizer and Speed Bumps

Also subscription line financing, hedge fund malaise, Swiss banks and performance art.

October 21, 2016 at 1:27 PM UTC

Matt Levine is a Bloomberg Opinion columnist. A former investment banker at Goldman Sachs, he was a mergers and acquisitions lawyer at Wachtell, Lipton, Rosen & Katz; a clerk for the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 3rd Circuit; and an editor of Dealbreaker.

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Banker conduct.

Maybe the most shocking piece of financial news in 2016 so far is that you can drink hand sanitizer. I mean, don't. (This is medical advice.) But if you do, you'll get pretty drunk? It's apparently how one Wells Fargo employee got through the day: