Hi, I'm back! I was away on paternity leave for a few weeks, during which I deleted the Twitter app from my phone, which is the single best use case I have yet found for Twitter. Few internet products have ever given me as much joy as Twitter did, when I deleted it. I don't know how Twitter can monetize that? Anyway now I'm back, at Money Stuff, and on Twitter.
The other appealing use case for Twitter seems to be to become president and then use the presidency, and Twitter, to pursue various revenge whims. That is monetizable, though apparently not by Twitter, and so of course: "This app will send you alerts when Donald Trump tweets about stocks you own." The app is called Trigger. (Counterpoint: "Stop worrying about Trump’s tweets.")