SEC Lifts Ban on Hedge Fund Advertising. Hilarity Ensues

Today the Securities and Exchange Commission approved a rule that would allow hedge funds to advertise publicly for the first time in 80 years. The ban had been intended to protect unsophisticated investors from the risky, barely regulated investment pools that now control more than $2 trillion in assets; the commission approved the change by a 4-to-1 vote. “Without common-sense protections, general solicitation will prove be a great boon to the fraudster,” Democratic Commissioner Luis Aguilar, the lone dissenter, said in a statement. “Experience tells us that this will lead to economic disaster for many investors.”

While the fund industry is taking its time focus-testing new marketing plans, the wiseguys on Twitter wasted no time offering up suggestions for hedge fund slogans that might appeal to the masses:

Everywhere you want to be (and a few places you dont!) #hedgefundslogans

— Barry Ritholtz (@ritholtz) July 10, 2013

What's-Left-Of-Your-Money Back Guarantee #HedgeFundSlogans

— Ivan the K™ (@IvanTheK) July 10, 2013

Creating Alpha since,well, mostly never #hedgefundslogans

— Barry Ritholtz (@ritholtz) July 10, 2013

You'd be better off with an index fund #hedgefundslogans

— Matt O'Brien (@ObsoleteDogma) July 10, 2013

Snitches Get Stitches #HedgeFundSlogans

— Ivan the K™ (@IvanTheK) July 10, 2013

High-water mark, what high-water mark…… #Hedgefundslogans

— InterestArb (@InterestArb) July 10, 2013

Because What's The Worst Thing That Can Happen #HedgeFundSlogans

— barnejek (@barnejek) July 10, 2013

We are not on the SEC's most wanted list. #HedgeFundSlogans

— Matt (@MattVATech) July 10, 2013

You want a friend? Get a dog #hedgefundslogans

— Eric Jackson (@ericjackson) July 10, 2013

    Before it's here, it's on the Bloomberg Terminal.