Transgender Day of Visibility at Bloomberg: Being an ally

As an out gay man, Stephen Grove was comfortable talking about LGBT issues with others. But when a sibling transitioned, he found himself looking for resources and information on how to support her. His sister’s journey happened at the same time he got involved in the LGBT & Ally Community at Bloomberg three years ago, and talking with people who had gone through similar experiences made all the difference.

“At first it was difficult, because I’d never really had an experience where someone close to me transitioned before,” he says. “When she first started talking to me about transitioning, I believed coming out as gay and expressing gender identity as the same, but she shown me how different they can be, and how much I have yet to learn.” That commitment to understanding diversity and inclusion has not only helped him to better understand his sister, but has brought instrumental perspectives to his work on a newly formed team that looks for ways to increase diversity in the newsroom by widening the talent pipeline, improving the diversity of sources and determining what “diversity” looks like for a company with locations around the world.

As Transgender Day of Visibility (TDOV) on March 31 approaches, we talked with Stephen about his own experiences and those of his sister, and his advice for others who want to be more supportive and inclusive in the workplace.

Learning through community
When Stephen, who works on the Bloomberg News Standards – Diversity and Training team, got involved with the LGBT & Ally Community at Bloomberg, it had been recently formed and was just a small group, he says. Over time, the group decided to look for ways to improve visibility and advocacy, not just to the community of members, but to Bloomberg as a whole. To do so, the group looked at global days throughout the year that could help spread awareness about the LGBT community, and TDOV stood out. “It’s a celebration day,” he says. “A way to support those in transition, and celebrate those who have already made the journey.”

The work Stephen was doing with the LGBT & Ally Community at Bloomberg dovetailed with the experience of his sister, who over the past few years had been expressing a desire to be more gender fluid. “We had been open about talking about her gender identity, and she came out as gay a few years before that,” he says. Stephen says he came out early in college, but when his sister started talking about her journey he realized it was new ground for him.

As part of Bloomberg’s first TDOV celebration, the organization worked with the Hetrick-Martin Institute, which provides direct support and referrals for young LGBT people, and Stephen says a young woman who had transitioned helped him understand the process better. “I always had a vision of the process as step-by-step, but my sister was going through a ping-pong approach, exploring for herself and what these different identifications might mean. It helped me to have this event, and gave me the courage to talk about it with my colleagues.”

Having that support was inspiring, he says, and the next year the LGBT & Ally Community at Bloomberg put together a panel with other Bloomberg employees who talked about their own journeys of transition or with loved ones who transitioned. “I talked about my sister, and while it was intimidating to talk to an audience about it, it helped to be open. People wanted to know more, which was heartening. Some colleagues said they were going through the experience with a son or daughter, or even themselves, and didn’t know who to turn to. It was empowering.”

He says his colleague Stella Campaner in particular has been a great help, because she’s from Brazil, where his sister now lives. “She’s given us resources on people to talk to and tips on how to navigate the workforce,” he says.

The importance of allies
Stephen says the LGBT & Ally Community at Bloomberg is focusing on allyship for its TDOV celebration this year. “As friends and colleagues, how can we be better allies?” he says. “Our family has always been very positive and supportive, but there are always challenges with transition and things that are so new and different.” Fielding questions from family members about which pronouns to use with his sister or what to say in certain situations highlighted the importance of allies and advocates both in a person’s private life and work life. “It’s important for my sister to have allies who understand what it means to be different,” he says.

In some ways it has been a struggle, he says, as his sister lives on a continent that isn’t always as safe or supportive of people who are transgender. “It’s something I worry a lot about in terms of safety. She’s savvy and has friends, and it’s relatively safe, but it’s difficult to have someone be so far away.” But her living there taught him that she’s looking for space to “make it on her own terms,” he says. “For me, that has been the biggest learning takeaway from all this — being an advocate first and learning how to help her best.”

Bloomberg’s core identity of volunteering and being active in the community has helped, he says. Working with the Hetrick-Martin Institute was especially rewarding, he says. “It’s been a couple years since I came out, but being able to see young people so confident and comfortable was so helpful. They’re not asking for space, but demanding it, and helped me support my sister in having that opportunity,” he says. “I would encourage anyone interested in being an ally or supporter to do the same and get involved — not just to give back but to expose yourself to different people in different stages and places.”

Embracing diversity in the workplace
As awareness of transgender and other LGBT experiences rises in the workplace – peers, managers and recruiters will need to incorporate it into how they do their work.

A commitment to learning and listening is key, Stephen says. Allyship is being able to identify those who do struggle in parts of their lives, whether it’s getting employed or finding homes or being out in public without being looked down upon. Talking to my sister, I’ve learned that even with the struggles I might have; there are issues I may never face.”

In the workplace, Stephen recalls how asking questions is often the best approach. “The best thing to do is admit you don’t know and seek the right resources to find out,” he says. “There are a number of people here who have asked me and those who are more visible about their experience about resources, but it’s also important to understand that everyone’s journey is unique — there isn’t a road map or manual. People just need to have someone to talk to and listen, and that can be helpful.”

Stephen finds that accommodation is crucial. Bloomberg as a company has been actively exemplifying this, he says. For example, in his office location in New York, the bathrooms have been changed into spaces that are less gendered. Bloomberg’s benefits also support employees who plan to transition, providing the full suite of gender-transition-related benefits recommended by the World Professional Association for Transgender Health. “It’s about giving people the opportunity to be themselves no matter how they choose to do that,” he says. “It goes all the way up to senior management, with Mike Bloomberg, our Founder, writing a forceful editorial about the recent military ban on transgender soldiers. Knowing there’s that kind of support from our leadership says a lot.”